Here are some reviews concerning our city's "Hottest New Club":

A pretentious space that is not conducive to dancing. The DJ booth and dance floor are too up front and center. You're not here to have a private experience with the music and discover great new song you're hearing for the first time. You're here to show off your pecs and your Armani or your new cleavage and $1,000 shift dress while pretending to accidentally spill your cosmo on the cutest person in the room. But if you want to marry a plastic doll, architect, engineer or a banker you should get your butt in here right now and start workin' it.

The guys were douchey, gel spiked hair and wannabe Armani black button up guys. Did I just teleport to the Jersey shore? My god the Aqua di Gio overwhelms the senses.

Servers are dressed revealing in black/ gray low cut lace corset tops and black hot pants. All of them seemed to be able to pull off the look. (Read my previous post for insight about how I feel about THIS.)

The reviews I read that were positive all cited the club's "hot, scantily clad girls" "guys with money" "long lines" (why on earth would this be a positive? Elbow to elbow shoving, bitchy, noisy crowds are horrible!) and "attractive decor." The attractive decor I will give them....you can see by the photo that it IS pretty. But add a teeming mass of humanity's dregs (which these types are, and no one will EVER convince me otherwise) and it all becomes cloying, pretensious and ugly.

If I wasn't already convinced, which I was, I must say that this place sounds like a true nightmare! I would be absolutely astounded if the music was worthwhile (little else matters when it comes to dancing.) But even if the sound happened to be tolerable, the fact that you have to wait HOURS to get in means the dance floor would be too packed to move. That said, the type of people described here usually - almost always - listen to total crap. I suspect it's Young Jeezy all the way. I will count myself very, very happy not to join the "in crowd" when it comes to this one.

Barf.